Oh come on, Mark. Nothing about that whole group was patient-doctor confidential. We were ALL in each other’s business. Some of us more successfully than others but still.
[…]
Before I realized she might really know someone like me? Some of it was an act…same spiel I’d given so many other therapists before her. But I think… I think a lot about that night. I was not…in a good place when I found her.
I know people would rather if I wasn’t a real person, just keep me the cartoon villain in your heads, because it’s easier to hate someone who you think of as pure evil. But I’m not… I’m not the devil’s incarnate. I’m a guy that’s had a really fucked up life.
And sometimes I really think your sister saved my life that night. Sometimes I wonder if she regrets that.
Nah. She would have found another way to get you out. And I wouldn’t have fucked everything up even more in the process. You all would have been better off if she’d just kicked me out of her office.
[He shouldn’t be doing this. He’s not supposed to be doing this. He knows that. He knows it’s part of the deal, to not put his trauma on Mark like this because it’s not fair, but he can’t stop. ]
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ninetydegrees
no subject
on 2022-06-25 10:16 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2022-06-25 10:26 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2022-06-25 10:27 pm (UTC)You don’t hold a monopoly on near-death experiences. Not even on recent ones.
I’m still technically broken.
no subject
on 2022-06-25 10:35 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2022-06-25 10:39 pm (UTC)Your sister ever tell you about the night we met?
no subject
on 2022-06-25 10:53 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2022-06-25 11:04 pm (UTC)Nothing about that whole group was patient-doctor confidential.
We were ALL in each other’s business.
Some of us more successfully than others but still.
[…]
Before I realized she might really know someone like me?
Some of it was an act…same spiel I’d given so many other therapists before her.
But I think… I think a lot about that night. I was not…in a good place when I found her.
no subject
on 2022-06-25 11:10 pm (UTC)cw: talk of previous suicidal ideation
on 2022-06-25 11:21 pm (UTC)But it was worse, then.
I know people would rather if I wasn’t a real person, just keep me the cartoon villain in your heads, because it’s easier to hate someone who you think of as pure evil.
But I’m not… I’m not the devil’s incarnate. I’m a guy that’s had a really fucked up life.
And sometimes I really think your sister saved my life that night.
Sometimes I wonder if she regrets that.[…
…
……]
Did you seriously just called me cowboy?
Re: cw: talk of previous suicidal ideation
on 2022-06-25 11:36 pm (UTC)And yes I did.
no subject
on 2022-06-25 11:48 pm (UTC)And I wouldn’t have fucked everything up even more in the process.
You all would have been better off if she’d just kicked me out of her office.
[He shouldn’t be doing this.
He’s not supposed to be doing this.
He knows that. He knows it’s part of the deal, to not put his trauma on Mark like this because it’s not fair, but he can’t stop. ]
I’m sorry.
I should go.
no subject
on 2022-06-26 01:41 am (UTC)Get some rest Damien.
no subject
on 2022-06-26 02:20 am (UTC)Goodnight, Mark.
no subject
on 2022-06-26 02:39 am (UTC)